Politi-Flix

Oblivious critical droning

DECLASSIFIED DRONE REPORT OF MISSION: OBLIVION

Instructions: Launch a critical drone at target and report back findings and observations regarding threats to American filmic interests.

Target: The movie Oblivion, reportedly harboring actors Tom Cruise, Andrea Riseborough, Olga Kurylenko, Melissa Leo, and Morgan Freeman; under the direction of Joseph Kosinski.
Location: Any theater showing target movie.

A FRACtured take on film

Room 237

A documentary about the various — and entertainingly outrageous — interpretations of Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining; directed by Rodney Ascher

Here are some theories about the film Room 237, which presents a number of theories about what Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining was really all about:

Filling in the blank spaces: Why I admired Roger Ebert

A blank page.

That’s both a writer’s bread-and-butter and stumbling block.

When faced with a blank page, some recoil at the prospect of having to create an award-winningly unique product. Others see an opportunity to express themselves, even if it may be mundane.

A review divided against itself…


Lincoln

Starring Daniel Day Lewis, Sally Field, David Strathairn, James Spader, Joseph Gordon Levitt; directed by Steven Spielberg

(With apologies to President Lincoln for changing the eloquent words expressed in his Gettysburg Address and Second Inaugural Address.)

2016 Reviews: Critic Man’s Cinema

2016: Obama’s America

A documentary about President Obama by Dinesh D’Souza (the author of a number of books critical of the President, including The Roots of Obama’s Rage and Obama’s America: Unmaking the American Dream)

Politi-Flix: Camp(aigning) against campaigns

The Colorado Statesman received the following press release from the campaign of the film The Campaign:

Attacks on The Campaign are no joke

Contact: Critic Man
Phone: KL5-5000
Email: Criticman@fake.email.com

The debate knowingly rises (sadly, again)

In 1999 at the time of the Columbine tragedy, The Matrix was released. Since that film depicted extreme violence and since the characters sported “cool-looking” dusters — long black trench coats that the Columbine killers also wore — many pointed to pop culture (violent video games, movies, heavy metal music, rap lyrics, etc.) as a source of the blame for the murders and mayhem.

Savage weed

Due to the nature of the film Savages, the following initiative was submitted to the Colorado Title Board for inclusion on the state ballot this November. Regrettably, it failed to get the requisite number of signatures as film critics were too baked to be bothered to collect them.

Cinematic alien immigrants

The following legislation has been introduced to help citizens immigrate into movie houses to see the films Prometheus and Men in Black III.